The Unusual Bank Experience

ITHE UNUSUAL BANK EXPERIENCE

I had just approached the bank teller’s window, relieved that not only did I not have to wait, but the bank appeared to be lacking in the long lines that I was used to seeing. Where was everyone? Perhaps I had just happened on a good time to do my banking. While trying to negotiate my cane, my handbag, my bank card and the two checks that were to be deposited into my bank account, my fingers kept cramping up on me. A former orthopedic physician had diagnosed the finger cramping as “trigger finger”. That was several years ago. On this day, however, the cramping was occurring on both my right and left hands. It was not just one trigger finger, it was two. What was going on? And, why now? The kind, empathetic female bank teller suggested that I should drink more water as she indicated she had witnessed the same with her mother-in-law. So, perhaps I was not experiencing symptoms of a stroke!

I finally completed my mission, slowly but surely, and just as I turned to leave the teller’s window, I noticed a rather long line of people with stares that said, “Could you hurry up already old lady?” Surprisingly for me, I was not embarrassed; for in the past, I could become embarrassed easily, possibly even apologetic for holding up the line. Instead, I experienced two emotions…one of anger the other of sadness. Angry enough to want to say, “This could be you if you live long enough, you bastards.” Sad, because at almost eighty-two years old, this is who I had become. For, I was once a high-heel wearing, fast walking, efficient female who held employment in a middle-management, stressful supervisory position in a local high school. I could not help but wonder, “When did my leg muscles become so weak that walking had become so difficult…laborious even?” “When did my lumbar spine-causing-sciatica deteriorate to a point where my spinal surgeon had in an honest, not-so-tactful description said, “Your back is a mess”? “Did my bilateral hip replacements contribute to the state I find myself in?” “Was it my right knee replacement that I endured almost a year ago?” Or, “Could it be the discrepancy in my leg length caused by my hip surgeries?” And, “Why all of a sudden were my fingers cramping up on me?” “When, exactly, did I become an afflicted “old lady”? My cognition is intact. “When and why has my body so punitively attacked me?”

These questions, which had become all-consuming thoughts on almost a daily basis, loomed even larger on this day as I could not get out of my head the daggered-looks that I received as I exited the bank teller’s window. I was not accustomed to receiving such looks at any point in my life; and just twenty years ago, which seemed like yesterday, I was just fine.

By the time I entered the bank lobby, I witnessed an elderly man walking hesitantly, slowly, purposefully. He too, walked with a cane. We came face-to-face, stopped, and looked at each other. He smiled and said, “Do you want to race?”  I smiled back and said, “No, I think you would beat me.” I then continued to my car which exhibited my exposed handicap tag which was parked in one of the few spots allotted for handicapped drivers. I assumed that this pleasant gentleman had just left his coveted space for the handicapped in order to complete his banking needs.

On my ten- minute ride home, new and different thoughts came to mind. Here we were, two elderly people trying our best to be versions of our old selves…still driving, still trying our best at independency. I am a Black female; he was a White male. Neither of us knew each other or the backgrounds from which we came, but we bonded with each other right then and there. It brought to mind how many more of us, no matter the perceived differences, would benefit if we stopped to see what we had in common instead of what divided us. I also thought of his smile and focused on his sweet countenance. It reminded me to be of good cheer; for despite our uncomfortable, inconvenient, sometimes irritating, annoying circumstances and travails, we are still here, we are still standing, we are still above ground, and as some would say, “It beats the alternative”. A good afternoon was had, after all!